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And of course, when men and women meet,
there's always a chance that something might happen... well, that was
the way my relationship slowly went downhill, I started betraying my
girlfriend, I was really good at finding excuses why I wanted to go out
alone or why I came home late, she never really recognized what was
going on.
Although this was kind of an adventure and for a while it was quite
fascinating, I wasn't very happy with the life I led those days. At the
beginning of this year the situation changed dramatically: she got
pregnant. First it was really a kind of shock for me, I thought that
this was the end of my happier days and I was now sentenced to lead the
life of a family man. But I kept thinking it all over and slowly I
decided that this would be all right for me.
Since then I also broke up with all those one-night stands and more kind
of sexual relationships as I had decided to take the full responsibility
and reduced my cyber-meetings to my best friends that I had learnt to
know there. Until one day.... well... actually it was a casual meeting
with a friend, we just sat out in a nice restaurant in the garden,
having a beer or two and we had also invited some other folks from the
chat, they were rather late because they had troubles finding us but
they finally made it, and amongst them there was this girl.... !!!
I knew her from the chat, she was really cute, but we had never met
before in real life, my goodness, I fell in love with her immediately.
But I was there with my girlfriend and she was there with her boyfriend,
so things seemed quite clear, everybody had his relationship and seemed
to be quite content, so I thought I better forget that quickly. But I
just couldn't get her off my mind and it seemed neither could she. So we
kept on meetin each other, just on a friends-only base, together with
other friends, we also made some trips together with our both partners,
but there was always this tense feeling, maybe everybody must have felt
that something is wrong here.
This went on for more than one month, I thought maybe we could just
become good friends and continue this way, but I knew that I needed her
around me some way. But, as I already mentioned, men and women together,
there's always a chance for things to happen, there was this wicked
afternoon that we spent together with a friend, we all had a lot of fun
and a lot of drinks, we sat there until late night.. then our friend
went off for the men's room for a minute and I think for the first time
we really looked into each others eyes and - ka-booooom!! I touched her
forehead and took her into my arms, saying nothing... this minute until
our friend came back from the lavatory, it lasted for a thousand years I
think.
When he came back he smiled and made some comment like "i knew this was
going to happen!" Later on we kissed and when I went home, my knees
really went trembling, I could hardly crawl down to the subway.
Something deep inside had happened, this was not the way the usual
affairs went, definitely not! I was hardly able to catch a clear thought
and slept very bad this night. I really knew that some very big change
in my life was happening. The next days we kept meeting each other again
and again, but somehow we both had the feeling that this might not be
such a good idea and that it might be better for both of us to part as
long as it was possible, but we just could not!!! She was everything
that I have been dreaming of all of my life, the way she looked, her
kind of humour, her agility.. just the woman of my dreams, and it seemed
that it was just the same with her.
I had no clue how this wicked situation could resolve at all, and
finally she said: "Listen, we can't continue this way. I love you I want
you, but I want you all for me. Either we take the step and leave our
partners or we better not meet each other again." This clear and
distinct argument gave my overloaded brain a little kick again, and I
started to think it all over as serious and objective as possible. I
thought how life with my girlfriend could go on... how long could I
carry on with her pretending that we were happy together, and what would
happen with the baby when we broke up in a few years?
My god, it was really hard for me... on the one hand the woman I was
really loving madly, on the other hand the girl that was pregnant. And,
was I really sure that this was the right woman for me? Or would we be
breaking up in a few weeks anyway.. my god, actually we didn't really
know very much about each other.. what should I do... But after some
hard days and nights, I finally came to a decision, I was sure that it
was definitely the right thing to do, I had to spend my life together
with this woman I loved so much, I had to go through this. It was hard
for my girlfriend to understand and even harder for her to take this,
but a few days later I called the woman of my dreams and told her: "I
did it. How about the two of us going to have breakfast?"
Well, and from this day on we were together, she told me that she had
already broken up with her guy a week ago or so, but she wanted to take
this decision on her own and didn't want to tell me about it in order
not to put me under any pressure that I would feel I had to follow her
lead. And since then things went better from day to day, and from day to
day I know again and again that I really did the right thing, this must
be what you call true love, and although we both weren't too keen on
getting married at all before, we both changed our minds, we are going
to marry next Spring and are both very positive about our common future,
about having children, about buying a flat for the two of us, about
growing old together.
She really made a happy man out of me, she is the one woman out of 3
billion that was made for me, and me, I was the lucky guy to find her!
"Martin"
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