So I got up the courage to write you my story.

I have been online since December of 99. I was finding chat a little boring by may of 2000. Well one day I just got into chat and a girl I talked to told me to get in voice chat. She was talking to all these guys and i was bored out of my mind so I posted my stats in the room and hoped I would get an answer. Well One guy in voice chat told me "oh wow you are beautiful" and he just sounded very sincere and sweet. Of course I replied with the typical "aww thank you very much". This was may 8th. 

We started talking and that night I stayed up for hours talking to this guy. We continued to chat for the next two days. Well I got up to check my e-mail and he sent me a card and a letter saying *this is quoted from the e-mail he sent me "Hey sweetie, I just got done taking my final. I think I did pretty good, but anyway I just wanted to thank you. You have been so sweet to me. It has been great getting to know you in the last two days. You are great to talk to. I will definitely talk to you anytime that you are on and I Just wanted to tell you that I miss you and I can't wait to talk to you again...Well hurry up and get on...lol.. Love always, Drew". 

I kept thinking he is just too sweet. Well we continued to talk late nights and during the afternoons when he got off work. College was also hectic for him so I totally understood that I couldn't have his full attention. By July I was kind of wondering what we were so I asked him "Drew exactly what are we?" and he replied "we are friends" my heart dropped for a second till he spoke again "but then again friends don't sit around everyday telling them how much they mean to them, how cute they are, and how much they miss each other when there not around". 

I really wanted to meet this wonderful creature in person. I mean he lives 30 minutes away from me so I dunno why we couldn't. One day one of our mutual cyber friends said that we should all get together and have a fun day at six flags St. Louis. I was like that would be soo great. She asked me why don't I invite him along, I told her I didn't have enough guts to ask him, so of course she did when I wasn't online and he ACTUALLY SAID YES, he even asked should he pick me up. So I was sooo excited I couldn't believe that this handsome guy was even interested in me. 

So it was set - about twenty of us were supposed to meet down the road from Six Flags, at a small little restaurant on July first. Well the morning before we were all supposed to meet I checked my e-mail once again and I got a e-mail from him which said "Hey Sweetie, I'm just getting ready to go to class and I thought I would write you. I really Miss you...that was so sweet what you wrote on that greeting...There is one more thing that I would like to tell you....I've been having second thoughts about meeting you....You are such a wonderful and sweet person, but I just don't think I am ready for it...sorry for any trouble that that causes you, and I can understand if you are mad....But I gotta go and I will talk to you later...I miss you so much...and you do mean so much to me>. Love ya, Drew".

I have never in my life cried over anyone and never a male. Tears just streamed down my face. I talked to him and he said it was because he found out that he was leaving for Toronto Canada to play hockey, and that he just didn't want to meet me and leave for months and hurt me like that, so we agreed that we would talk all the time still. Well less and less he got online and when he did he wasn't the same. He acted like I was his little sister and that I was just an "online person" and it was not a big deal. One day in September I got in chat, for the first time in a while because there was no reason to get on anymore. He happened to be on. 

He asked me if I got his e-mail and I told him no I haven't, he figured that because he said I would normally write him back. So I asked him "Why what did it say?", he responded "I was just asking how you were and what I thought of you", I asked "what exactly do you think of me?", he said he thought I was wonderful and he couldn't stop thinking about me. I started to get hope so went into chat for the next couple days and asked if anyone has seen him, everyone answered no, I have written him e-mails and I never get a reply back.

I gave up going into chat and waiting for him. Well it's now the end of November and I still think about him all the time. I Just keep living in this world of mine that maybe just maybe someday we will bump into each other and just know that we made a mistake and it will end happily ever after. I know that only happens in fairy tales but one can wish can't they?

"Gina"