Bella's Story - Internet Love Stories

Nina:
It's strange how things happen... you are trudging through the mundane weary lanes of life when suddenly, out of nowhere, love walks in and touches your life in a way that you know that nothing could ever be the same again...
>> Continued

She's From: Australia
He's From: Greece

I was a first year University student and just getting to know how to use the Internet.

I had heard about chat programs, but whenever I was game enough to venture into a channel, I just got bored with the people I saw and spoke to.

During my lunch breaks, I would go to the computer labs and waste some time surfing the net with a friend. One particular week, I was determined to find a specific server, one that wasn't English, as I wanted to further my conversational skills in mother language (let's say it was Greek). For a whole week I searched the net for a server with a Greek channel that didn't use much English, but to no avail. I remember saying to myself on the last day of the week, "that's it. If I don't find it today then it doesn't exist". And that's when I found the exact server and channel I was looking for. The people there were young and funny, and after chatting for an hour I really liked it, and decided that's where I'd come if ever I was in the mood for chatting online, improving my Greek at the same time.

Well about two weeks later, I was on my break at Uni and chatting in MIRC. It was the early hours of the morning in Greece, which is where the majority of people are from. I was the only one from Australia, and a few were from the U.S. A few of us were just talking on the channel about how bored we all were, so I private messaged one guy I'd there and asked him, "so, what do you want to talk about?" So we started chatting for the next few hours, saying where we're from and things like that. I didn't expect to talk or even see him again, but the next day I was back online, and there he was. It was a pleasant surprise to see him again, because he was so nice to talk to. He was so funny, he cracked me up. We flirted a little, and he told me that he had a girlfriend. That for me initially was like a challenge. I wondered if we could still talk openly the way we had been, even though he was attached. Then, kind of like out of the blue, almost as a joke really, we began to have cyber sex. It was the first time for me, and to my surprise for him too. He was an IRC veteran almost, chatting for a few years already, whereas I had only begun a few weeks before, and was already having cyber sex!!

The next night I was back on, and we cybered again. I started to get this strange feeling, like our relationship was just about sex and nothing else. I told him what I thought right there and then, and he said he wanted to know everything about me - what made me happy, sad, my likes, my dislikes, my thoughts - he wanted to know the real me. He said he couldn't stop thinking about me. I was so relieved to hear him say that, because he was all I could think about too.

He was 23, and in the middle of a two year relationship with his girlfriend. And also a med student. I was 18, and had only ever kissed a few guys here and there, but never anything serious. We chatted on MIRC almost every day, and when we couldn't be online we sent emails to each other, saying how much he missed and needed me, how he couldn't wait to see me online again. I kept thinking how weird it was, and how could he possibly be thinking these things when he had a girlfriend. It was about a month to two months later that we both realised what we shared was so much more than just a casual relationship.

We were chatting, when just out of nowhere he said to leave him alone, that I was crazy. I said I loved him and why was he telling me this? I just didn't understand why or where this was coming from. I was so hurt. The pain that I felt was unbearable. I disconnected, and cried my eyes out on my bed. I felt as if he was misleading me all this time, like love to him was just a joke.

That night when I logged on to check my email, which was about 7-8hrs later, there was an email waiting from him. What had actually happened, was that his sister had walked into his bedroom and saw on the screen me typing how much I loved him. She started teasing him and threatening to tell his girlfriend. He didn't know what to do, so he acted as if I was crazy, like he didn't know me, so his sister would see that what I was saying wasn't for real. After reading his email, I was so relieved, like there was a glimmer of hope left for us. I logged onto the IRC, and sure enough there he was waiting for me. He couldn't tell me enough how sorry he was for what had happened. He knew I was hurt and what I was thinking, and said that the pain he felt when he thought he had lost me forever was unbearable. It was after that incident that we both realised how much in love we both were. The thought of losing one another again like that was frightening. Neither of us wanted to go through that kind of pain again. We knew we had found our soul mate, but we were so far apart, and that was where the pain lay.

He then told me that he had decided to move to Australia so that we could be together. In two months time he had planned on being here, and I was the happiest girl on this earth. The next month was summer vacation in Greece, and he went away with his family to the beach for two weeks. We couldn't bare to be away from each other for so long, but there was nothing else we could do. They went every year on vacation together, along with his friends. It was then that he asked for my phone number. It was the perfect answer. We were so eager and excited to hear each other's voices that he called me that night, the next night and the night after that - all before he even left for the beach.

It was so amazing to hear his voice. I don't even remember what we talked about. We were just laughing a lot and enjoying the moment. I remember sometimes I would just close my eyes and listen to his voice, not even paying attention to what he was saying. The time that he was away on holidays was absolute hell. His girlfriend was there with him as well, but he found times to be alone where he'd all me on the telephone, even though he knew the phone bill that he was going to receive would nearly kill him.

When he got back, we finally exchanged pics. We never had a chance before because I didn't have a scanner, and we wanted to wait so that we could exchange them together. We were already so much in love, and after seeing his pic nothing changed, except for the fact that I now had a face to put to this beautiful person that I loved and dreamed about.

We started writing to each other through the post as well. I sent him photos of me, he sent me postcards and a love letter. He finally broke it off with his girlfriend as well. He loved me and only me, and now I knew it was true. He said his girlfriend had noticed a change in him, that he was more distant, but he never told her about me, just that he thought that they grew apart and it was better that they remained just friends.

Christmas that year, 7 months after we first started chatting, and we still weren't together in real life. Three attempts at coming to Australia had failed, and it was Christmas and New Years Eve already. I will never forget how lonely I felt that year. It is a time that is suppose to be spent with those you love, but mine was on the other side of the world, and I felt like there was a huge hole in my heart. I cried myself to sleep on Christmas Eve, and Christmas Day was just the worst I had ever felt in my entire life.

The pain we were both feeling at being so far apart was unbearable. There were times where he thought that he couldn't go on, so he lied and said that he had a girlfriend so that I would leave him, and move on with my life. But the two times that it happened, and also when I did it too, we were always back together again within a week because we just couldn't bare to be apart.

A few months later, on Valentines Day, he told me that he started a project and needed to finish it before we could be together. He felt his life was a mess, and had dropped out of med school because all of his time was spent online. Starting this project with a fellow doctor was like a way to salvage that.

With everything that has happened, it has taken its toll on my entire life, including my health. Today, in the 15 months since we first met, I have lost about 10kg from the stress of waiting for him, and am now on anti-depressants because it eventually became all too much. We talk every single day for hours on end, when we wake up in the morning to when we go to bed at night. At the moment, my life is just a waiting game - waiting for my love to finally come to me.

I will try and keep you posted on any developments in the coming months:) In the meantime, I wish you all the very best of luck with your relationships.

"Bella"

>> Continued in Part Two